borderline of the kindergardners
by captaindrake123
Summary: imagine your favorite vault hunter chars to be little kids in school with lots of explosions guns and a whole lot of detention
1. Chapter 1

yoloswag motherf- NO!

commander caleb:my mic!

captaindrake:my fanfic my rules and i say this happens

an airplane lands on commander caleb and captain drake takes the mic

captaindrake:hah!anyways everybody i hope u like this and no one has ever done something like this for bl2 so leave a reeview :D commander caleb moves captaindrake:god how is he alive is he on stairoids?

first day:

teacher:alright class my name is Ms .Goopmocker *a horrible teacher i use to hate* now one at a time come up to introduce ur selfs and be good about it!

Ms .Goopmocker: alright first maya.

maya walks up

maya:umm hello everyody my name is maya and i am 5 i love to have new freinds and love cholclate icecream

teacher:alright now go sit next is hmmmmm sadador?

salvador:thats salvador i am 5 too and i love muffins and if u take them from me ILL KILL YOU AMIGOS!

Ms .Goopmocker:alright alright go sit now hmmmm kreig or whatever his name is

kreig gets up

kreig:I LIKE MEAT!

kreig sits back down

Ms .goopmocker:...ok next up is axton

axton:hey im axton im funny like to play in the park and shoot stuff

salvador:ME TOO!

Ms .goopmocker:SHUT UP!now up next is jack

jack:its handsome jack!i am 5 and i am a hero that will one day get rid of all these bandits!

axton:jackass*whispers to salvador*

Ms .goopmocker:alirght now sit ur but down now next up is gaige

gaige:oh coming!hi everybody my names gaige i like science and making things like deathtrap here*summons deathtraps*

Ms .Goopmocker:what the hell!put that peice of junk away!

a sad gaige puts deathtrap away and sits back down

maya:hey u ok?

gaige:she called him a peice of junk

axton:shes just an old hag

Ms .Goopmocker:I HEARD THAT AXTON DETENTION!now lets see...zero? what kind of a name is that!?

zero walks up

zero:my name is zero i am an assassin*pulls put his sword*and don't ask me anything further

Ms .Goopmocker:*gulp*go sit back down!

zero puts his sword away and goes to sit

ok and here are the rest of the guys blake,mad maw,tina,roland,brick,mordecei,lilith,flesh stick,and torgue introduce themselves

Ms. Goopmocker:ok you all sit down and be quiet while i do something important out in the hall

the kids ignored her and walked around and talked to eachother

axton:hello maya

maya:hi nice to meet you

salvador shot a stuffed bunny

salvador:awwwww yea!

jack and his freinds blake mad maw and flesh stick went to give some kids wedgies

maya:hey look isn't it that zero guy?

zero was in the corner meditating ignoring everybody

salvador:yea hes pretty cool lets go see if he wants to talk

axton:ummm i don t know he doesen't look like he wants to talk

maya:don't tell me your scared fine ill go talk to him myself

axton:this might not end well

maya walks up to zero

maya:hello

zero:...hello

maya:its nice to meet you im maya

zero:zero

salvador walks up with maya and so do jack and his freinds

jack:hey why you talkin to the dork in the mask

salvador:lay off jackass

jack:make me

him and his goons are ready to beat up salvador for they brought there guns

jack:oh u are s-*knocked out*

mad maw:hey who did that!?

zero:that be me *reapears from deception*

maya and salvador:whoa

mad maw charges zero but couldn'tbecause he was stuck in mid air by mayas phasleock

maya:thats right im a siren

zero displayed a LOL because of mayas phaselock ir burnt mad maws pants off and showed my little pony underwear everyone laughed as he ran to the classroom bathroom

salvador:wooo!

maya:wow i didn't think that would happen oh well

zero displayed a xD over his visor

gaige:whoa so cool holoemiters!?thats awesome!

zero:yes they are a useful tool

gaige:srry its just i never seen an emote holoemitter before its really rare

salvador:axton come over here and meet are new freind

zero:freind?

maya:we are freinds aren't we?

zero displayed a :) over his visor because he did not have any freinds before

axton:hello

zero:iam zero/the ghost assassin/prepared to strike

gaige:wow u spoke haiku cool

axton:whats that?

maya shrugged so did salvador

the teacher came back and noticed the mess and was furious

Ms .Goopmocker:SIT DOWN YOU ASSHOLES!

axton:SHUT UP YOU OLD HAG!

Ms .Goopmocker:why i otta*knocked out*

zero::D were free

the class continued and it was the start of a new year and a whole lot of detention


	2. Chapter 2 detention

captaindrake:STOP IT!

commandercaleb:I WANT TO BE IN IT!

captaindrake:I WILL CRUSH YOU AGAIN MY FANFIC!

commmandercaleb:*runs*cya suc-*hits a stop sign*

captaindrake:hah!nice,anyways hope you enjoy the new chapter and if you like it leave a review and if you don't thats not my fault anyways enjoy

* * *

detention with goopmocker :

Zero,axton,and salvador were in detention after school with because axtonmade fun of her,zero knocked jack out*and her*and salvador just talked to some people.*yea thats how cruel she is*

zero:Bored...bored...i am really bored.

goopmocker:SHUT UP YOU LITTLE BASTARDS!anyways im off to the teachers lounge my boyfreind will be watching you.

salvador:YOU ACTUALLY GOT A BOYFREIND!?

axton:BULLSHIT!

Ms .Goopmocker:SHUT IT ANOTHER HOUR OF DETENTION ALL OF YOU!

zero:But i did-

Ms .Goopmocker:3 HOURS!

Just then her ugly boyfreind came in he had bedhead smelled like drugs and had warts all over his face.

Mr. Negro:Hello*burp*students im mister negro

salvador:HAHAHA!

Ms .Goopmocker:SHUT IT!Alright ill be in the teachers lounge by sweatie.

they started making out.

everyone:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

axton:KILL ME NOW!

salvador:WHYYYYYYYYY!*HURLS*

Zero ran to the bathroom for he puked in his helmet.

salvador:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

axton:*grabs a dagger*I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

salvador:NOOOOO! WE HAVE TO BE STRON-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

the two finally stop making out and left

Negro:Hey where that zero kid?

Everyone hears zero hurling in the bathroom.

salvador:where do you think?!

negro:ALRIGHT YOU LITTLE ASSHOLES LISTEN UP!im not gonna take it easy on you like my darling girlfriend.

axton:EASY!?

negro:I HAVE 3 RULES NOW LISTEN UP!

1. no talking or moving.

2. no weapions!

3. most importantly...NO MUFFINS!

salvador:WHAT!?...*DROPS TO HIS KNEES*NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Negro wips him.

salvador:Owww.

negro:PICK YOUR SRRY ASS UP AND SIT DOWN!AND ZERO GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM NOW!

They did what they were told and now with maya and the others.

maya:Ok I heard screaming were goin in there.

gaige:Operation detention escape is a go!

maya:We need more people though to help hmmm...gaige do you still have your homework pass?

gaige:Yep.

They went over to the playground and found jack with his friends.

jack:So you want me to help you guys?what do i get?

gaige:*shows homework pass*

jack:DEAL!

maya:We still need a distraction.

Krieg shows up.

krieg:ILL HELP PRETTY LADY!

maya:Thanks

gaige:Alright lets do this!

phase 1:

Zero salvador and axton were being forced to watch a video that was very irritating to zero.

zero:...AHHHHHHHHH*SLICES IT IN HALF* that was a dishonor to all assassins.

axton:...*shivers*

negro:3 MORE HOURS O-*he was interrupted by a sound outside*whats that?you kids stay put!

He walks out the door.

phase 2:

Gaige opened a window while negro was distracted by krieg

krieg:MEAT!*THROWS MEAT EVERYWHERE*

negro:YOU LITTLE MOTHERF*CKER!

Now with maya and the others

jack:Come on

axton:WHY DIDN'T YOU COME SOONER!?

maya:Why what happend!?

zero:Something none of us should have seen.*shivers*wait why is jack helping us!?

gaige:I bribed him.

mad maw:Umm shouldn't we i don t know...LEAVE!?

Zero salvador leave with tem out of the room.

phase 3:

Negro was chasing krieg

krieg:meat...MEAT...MEAAAAT!

Blake covered the floor with meat where krieg was leading negro.

Negro:IM GONNA TBAG YOUR-*SLIPS*

Blake starts recording and talks to the camera.

blake:Yoloswag peeps im totally pranking this dude being a dick to this schools students and if you want more subscribe to

motherf*ckers end.

jack:Your recording for motherf*ckers end when were running for are life!?

blake:haters gonna hate.

salvador:*sees a muffin that gaige has*MUFFIN!

gaige:yea i thought you would want one so do you want to spli-*salvador swipes it and swallows it hole*YOU LITTLE!

SALVADOR:he out lawed muffins in there!

zero:*gets axton and salvadors weps and gives it to them for they were taken away*he deserves to die

axton:DUST THIS BITCH!

everyone shoots every bullet out of there guns into as he laid there in a pool of bloode

zero:*cuts his head off* A head for my wall.

salvador:let me have it plz he outlawed MUFFINS!

zero:He insulted assassins everywhere.

axton:He grossed us out by making out with goopmocker! I almost killed myself.

everyone:EWWWWWWWW.

jack:What does he mean he insulted assassin's everywhere?

salvador:...you don't wanna know

maya:Hey zero how about we all get icecream?

zero:I need it that image will never leave my head.*shivers*

They went out for icecream but salvador just ate muffins.

jack:My treat everyone my dads rich and i got 2000$ in my pocket!

They all had a good time and went back to there normal routines and now the next day at school they were playing around in class because never showed up.*or did she?*

axton:*stares at lilith and drouls*

zero:Dude your drooling.*shuts axtons mouth*

axton:She is...beautifal.

salvador:She is pretty i have to admit.

kreig:PRETTY LADY!

salvador:What do you think zero?

zero:eh.

over by lilith

lilith:hey brick i think i have a crush on that guy over there

brick:who?

lilith:That guy wearing a mask.

brick:You mean zero!?

lilith:why not hes tall dark and mysterious i like it. *smiles*(captaindrake:CRAZY TWIST XD)

brick:ok what ever you say lil*goes back to punching a stuff bear*

back with the group

axton:just eh!?shes beautiful!

salvador:whoa whoa axton its ok man

axton:fine but if you dear say shes ugly i will murder you!

zero:whatever

Goopmocker comes in

goopmocker:SIT DOWN ALL OF YOU!*SHOUTS LOUDER THAN USUAL*

everyone obeys and goes to there seats

Ms. Goopmocker:who killed...MY BOYFREIND!?

everyone:FLESHSTICK!

salvador:hey!* grabs salvador shotgun and shoots fleshstick*

tina:YES HES DEAD THAT SON OF A BITCH KILLED MY PARENTS!

Ms. Goopmocker:GO F*CK YOURSELF!

The police came in and put handcuffs on.

Police officer:srry kids this woman has commited many crimes and has muredered childeren and totured them.

Ms .Goopmocker:I WILL RETURN!

everyone:...YAY!

* * *

captaindrake:ok i am proud of what i did in this story and i have no regrets!

Ms. Goopmocker:YOU LITTLE MOTHERF*CKER!

captaindrake:AHHHHHHH!I REGRET NOTHING!AND PLZ LEAVE A REVIEW!

throws furniture at me.

captaindrake:SHIT!

commandercaleb:HAH!*GETS CRUSHED BY FURNITURE*

xD


	3. Chapter 3 wow

captaindrake:oh hey everyone if you read my last chapter then im srry about that thing when it didn't show the name of who was talking in some parts im fixing that so anyways i hope you enjoy this one plz leave a review

commandercaleb:oh hey drake

caqptaindrake:oh hey you like ur new mic?

commandercaleb:oh yea but do you want to go to mcdonalds?

captaindrake:oh sure just let mee see my money real quick.*checks wallet*what the!?

commandercaleb:*trys to escape*

captaindrake:YOU LITTLE MOTHERF-

* * *

love problems:

now with the group at the school

zero:soooo wheres are new teacher?

carroll:RIGHT HERE!my names carol ill be your new teacher

axton:well he seems nice

carroll:ok everybody today its a free day because its friday so theres no work because of what happened yesterday

salvador:YOU MEAN THAT LADY THAT TORTURED US!?

carroll:yea that on*phone rings*oh hey guys i gotta take this i think u can take care of yourselfs right?

everyone:yes !

left the room and everyone started talking and playing around and with lilith she was staring at zero while hiding

zero:thats how i beat the shit out out of that guy he stole my sword no one does that

maya:wow thats brutal so speaking of your sword can i see it real quick?

zero:whyyyyyy?

maya:its a cool sword i never seen anything like it

zero:fine *hands her his sword*

maya:wow *swings it and almost killed axton*

axton:WHAT THE HELL!? i don t have any insurance!

zero:can i have my sword back?

maya:sure

maya hands zero his and there hands touch and maya blushes and turns away while zero felt weird

axton:...hey guys have you see lilith?

maya:shes over by brick

the bell rings for lunch time

krieg:MEAAAAAT!*he screams it until he gets to the cafeteria*meat!

krieg takes all the meat

axton:HEY!I WANTED SOME OF THAT!

they start fighting over it and then axton got a peice an ran

axton:YES!*eats it while running*

krieg:MY...MEAAAAAAATTTTT!*GOES INTO BUZZAX RAMPAGE*

lilith:boys

axton runs away from krieg in fear

zero:ofcourse this happens

salvador:HEY GUYS CHECK IT*has kriegs tray full of meat*

maya:pass some over here

jack:I WANT SOME!

axton comes by and swipes the plate

axton:CYA!

JACK:fuck!

axton eating it while hes running

axton:you'll never catch m-*axton is knocked out by krieg and he takes his plate*

krieg:YOU WERE SAYING MEATBAG!

after lunch its recess everbodys outside zero is in a tree meditating but lilith was there

lilith:hi

zero dosen't say anything so lilith assumed he was asleep and put lipstick on and tryed to kiss him

zero:!*jumps from tree*

lilith:hey!

zero runs and bumps into axton

zero:hide me!*hides behind axton*

axton:what goin o-*axton is pushed by zero and into lilith and gives axton a thumbs up and disapears* oh..hey lilith

lilith:oh hi srry about that(hes kinda cute)

axton:oh its ok(heres my chance!)hey do you wanna go out?

lilith:well...yea sure*they hold hands*

roland walks towards lilith with flowers buts sees them holding hands and slowly backs away behind a tree*those of you who love roland he will eventually get a girl he likes but not now*now with zero and the gange talking

maya:she tryed to kiss you?

zero:yes!

salvador:wow your gettin the chikas

zero:shut it

salvador:what!?

gaige:so you just paired her up with axton?

zero:apparently

maya:just by pushing him towards lilith?

zero:i guess

salvador:when i get the love of my life mind pushing me towards her?

zero:...whatever

zero was confused enough as it is and now back in class carroll has some shocking news

carroll:alright class we have a new student and his name is flynt!

zero:FLYNT!?

maya:whos flynt?

axton:hes the neighborhoods bully

zero:and he hates me

flynt:zero!

zero:shit

gaige:what did u do to him!?

zero:i beat him

carrol trusts the students would be ok and went to the teachers lounge to sort out some papers

jack:hey you wanna be freinds?

flynt:sure!

they start beating up kids and start heading towards zero

zero:haven't you been embaressed enough?

flynt:oh you will be srry

flynt shot fire at zero but he dodges and it hits salvadors muffin and turns it to ash

salvador:you...rrrrrrggghhhh

salvador starts powering up his gunzerker attack

axton:EVERBODY TAKE COVER!

salvador starts shooting two rocket launchers everywhere and blows up desks walls and windows while evyone took cover accept flynt and got the sh*t beatin out of him

zero:you done!?

salvador:yes I am. ANYONE HAVE ANOTHER MUFFIN!?

the school bell rings meaning its the end of the day and all the kids let and when came in lets just say he had some therapy to go through and outside with the vault hunter group they called themselves they met there parents outside waiting for them and the parents told them that they were going to have a sleepover at jacks house and have fun

averyone:ahhhhhhhh

salvador:this will not end well

* * *

captaindrake:i hope you liked it plz leave a review :D

commandercaleb:SICK HIM WOLVES!*they run after me but i had red eyes and scared the shit out of them so they ran away*well...crap

captaindrake:yea ur dead*chases him and brakes his back*


	4. Chapter 4 sleepover

captaindrake:ok you won't be seeing caleb for a while

commandercaleb shows up in a wheelchair

commandercaleb:yolo!

captaindrake:oh come on

commandercaleb:everybody loves me!

captaindrake:no your a dick you won't leave me alone

commandercaleb:well there was a reason why i came here

captaindrake:that wasn't to bug me?

commandercaleb:well you have to pay my bill of 1000$ in injuries

captaindrake:plz leave a review oh and caleb no i don't because i have diplomatic immunity

commandercaleb:SINCE WHEN!?

captaindrake:just now my fanfic my rules ha!

* * *

sleepover:

the gang is now over at jacks house doingg a sleepover because of there parents thinking of a way to get along with eachother(because the parents usually don't like eachother) and now over by jacks house

zeros father:how about the kids go to the other room while the grownups talk

axtons father:good idea

(just to say zeros father does have a suit on)eveybody moves to the other room except the parents but even in a another room they can still hear them fighting

jack:...wanna play in my playground!?

blake:are parents are fighting and you want to play in your playground...seems legit

they all went to the playground

salvador:AXTON TOOK MY MUFFIN!

axton:ITS MY MUFFIN YOU TOOK DUMBASS!

salvador:whats yours is mine and whats mine is yours right?!

axton:not anymore

gaige:why the f*ck do you care so much about muffins!?

salvador:I LOVE THEM THERE THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD

krieg:MEEEEEAAAAAT!

everyone stares at him

krieg:i say we all just shut up and forget this nonsense*talks sanely*

everyone stares at him dropping there jaw

zero:!...

maya:...

axton:WHAT THE F*CK

krieg:...STOP LOOKING AT ME!

zero goes to the pool and jumps in*still with his suit on*and the others see him

maya:wait were swimming now?

zero:no i just jumped in to see if i wasn't dreaming...

the others went away but something unexpected happens

zero:wheres my sword!?

he looks around the pool to see if he dropped it*he was swimming underwater*

zero:...*jumps out of the waterAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!AXTONNNNN!*LOL SO PISSED*

zero starts running at super inhuman speed and runs to the inside and everyone can hear him screaming

maya:do you hear that?

axton:i feel that

over at the school

carroll:ahhh a nice refreshing bev-AHHHHHHHHHHHH!-what the heck is that!?

out in space

alien:ok start the invasion on e-AHHHHHHHHHHH!-it hurts!RETREAT!

30 years later

?:ok mother im going back to save my fa-AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!-daddy?

back to the present zero just ran right through axton literally

zero:sword I NEED my sword

axton:you...ok..man?

a ghost of an old enemy appears in zeros mind:i think your veins broke

zero:SHUT UP GHOST OF DEATHSTOKE!

axton:who are yo-

zero:IM NOT CRAZY YOUR CRAZY!ESPECIALLY YOU DEATHSTROKE!

ghost of deathstroke:meh

zero:sword hand now plz

axton:well i sorta don't...have it

bloode starts to bleed from zeros helmet

zero:no...

axton:uhhh

zero:noooo*snaps out of it*AH!where am i?why you here?whos this guy?...wheres deathstroke?

axton:wait i thought you killed that guy

zero:oh i did hes gone huh

axton:...

zero:wheres my sword!?

axton:what about that guy on th-

zero:WHERES MY SWORD!?

axton:salvador has it

just as axton said that he disapeared but not because of deception because of how fast he ran

zero:SALVADOR!

salvador:WHAT!?

zero:sword hand now!

salvador:i used it to make muffins oh and i gave it to gaige want one?*hands him one but zero takes it and crushes it and shoves it his face*cruel.

zero ran to gaige

zero:WHERE IS IT!?

gaige:WHAT!?

zero:SWORD GIVE NOW!

gaige:i gave that to krieg

he ran but now before he kicked her new invention

gaige:HEY!

zero ran to krieg who was eating meat that was cut perfectly(and guess how lol)

zero:WHERE IS IT!?

krieg:mmmmmm meat

zero slaps the meat out of his hand and tackels him

zero:WHERE IS IT!?*STRANGLES HIM*

krieg:AHHHHHH!GET OFF ME STICK M-

zero:WHERE IS MY F*CKIN SWORD NOW!?

kreig was so suprised how angry he was and for the first time was scared

krieg:...what is this feeling..IN MY STOMACH!?

zero:THAT WOULD BE MY FIST THROUGH YOUR STOMACH IF YOU DON T TELL ME WHERE IT IS!

krieg:I GAVE IT TO PRETTY LADY!

zero stops strangling him and run towards maya

maya:wow this thing is cool*swings it*

zero:WHERE IS IT!?

maya:wheres what and why is ur mask covered in bloode?

zero:MY VEINS BROKE OUT OF ANGER AND I WANT MY SWORD!

maya:ok ok ok*hands him his sword but jack takes it

jack:wow cool i think ill try this o-*zero stangles him*

zero:GIVE IT!

jack lets go of the sword and zero takes it and leaves

blake:remind me to never take his sword

maya:what happened to krieg?

krieg:FREAKY MAN HAPPENED!

they all went back to normal but mayas teen brother showed up with some freinds

maya:what do you want eddy?

eddy:i just wanted to say stay away from us were doing something really important

maya:you mean reading magezines?

eddy:shut we gotta go cya*throws icecream on salvadors head*

salvador:YOU LITTLE MOTHERF*CKERS!

eddy:look whos talking

maya and axton hold salvador back

salvador:LET ME AT HIM!

one of eddys freinds flanksteak takes zeros sword

flanksteak:i don t think you should be playing with th-*getting strangled*

everyone stared as zero beat the shit out of that guy and then the teenagers leave

zero:no one steals my sword

blake:YOU JUST LET HIM DO THAT!?

maya:i was always kinda soft when it came to family

axton:BULLSH*T HE NEEDS A TASTE OF HIS OWN MEDICINE!

maya:wellim pretty sure there reading nude magezines right now

salvador:allwe have to do is show are parents what there doing

axton:i already have a plan

axton sets ihs plan into motion

axton:zero go!

zero turns invisible and heads towards the teenagers and puts one of his power kunais on each chair and it burns there asses

eddy:AHHHH!

fleshstake:oh god!

zero:KISS MY ASS BITCHES/FOR IM IMMORTAL/AND YOU ARE DUMBASSES

eddy:that little haiku freak get him!

they chased after zero and while there distracted maya took the magezines

axton:gaige!get deathtrap!

gaige summons deathtrap and he goes towards one of the teenagers

wot:AHHHHH DEADLY ROBOT!

deathtrap chases him the opposite way zero was getting chased

salvador:HEY EDDY EAT A DICK!*throws icecream at him*

eddy:why you!*CHASES HIM*

axton and kreig prepared as the teenager was running towards them

axton:maya are the magezines in place!?

maya:sure are

krieg:there coming!

they all lead the teenagers towards the same pathway

axton:PULL!

they pulled the rope as salvador zero and deathtrap jumpedover the rope and the teenagers tripped and slid as the magezines flew into there face as they slid into the parents room and stopped with the magezines right next to them

mayas mother:whats this?*she looked at the magezines*oh my god!

the parents were furious with them

feshsticks dad:just as were having a good time you guys had to do this

wots mother: i think no tv,no hanging with freinds,phones,or games should do it

parents:agreed

the teenagers were grounded and the group was getting ready to show something else

jack:oh hey dad look at this tape

jacks dad looks at the tape and sees the teens on the internet buying sex toys

teenagers:...

jack:you all grounded for 6 months!

the parents agreed and went back to what they were doing as the group high-fived eachother(or in zeros case high four)as the teen agers went to ther rooms grounded

jack:that was awsome!

blake:hah i knew that video cam would work!

maya:zero what you said to them was priceless

zero:XD

axton:i told yo guys i had a master plan

salvador:hah there probably so pissed right now

gaige:best..sleep over...EVER!

* * *

captaindrake:hah lol i hope you guys liked it i kinda worked hard on this one and im proud of it

commandercaleb:i didn't like it

captaindrake:no one cares what you think you just hate me

commandercaleb:true


	5. Chapter 5 suprise

captaindrake:oh your asking for it!

commandercaleb:BRING IT ON CUPCAKE!

we both start fighting

capraindrake:oh you are s-oh hey everybody im sorta busy right now but i hope y-*gets punched but knees him in the stomach*you like this chapter

we continue to fight

sleepover part 2:

the group was split from boys and girls to different rooms to sleep in but the were still up for now and talking now with the boys

zero:krieg remember when you acted sane?

krieg:SO WHAT!?

zero:could you do it again?

krieg:NEVER!

salvador:but i got the video cam on

krieg:NO NOT GONNA HAPPEN FOR I AM THE HELL THAT DEATHS US ALL!

axton:well thats useless

now with the girls

maya:ok what should we do?

lilith:how about truth or dare

gaige:YES!i love that game!

maya:wait theres only the three of us

gaige:so what?im pretty sure we can do it with three people right?

lilith:i don't mind

maya:ok

the get into a circle*not very big considering theres only three girls xD*

maya:ill go first,lilth truth or dare?

lilith:hmmm...dare

maya:ok i dare you to go downstairs and write a marker mustache on your moms face*evil grin*

lilth:uhhhhh well atleast its no-

maya:and you have to use permanent marker

lilth:f*ck you

lilth goes downstairs and writes a curly mustache with permanent marker on her mothers face while shes asleep and goes back upstairs

lilith:you happy now!?

maya:very

lilth:gaige truth or dare

gaige:truth!

lilth:which boy in the other room can you not stand?

gaige:welll id have to pick...ZERO!hes always talkin about F*CKIN ACCURACY F*CK ACCURACY!

in the other room with the boys they having a similar conversation

zero:gaige is rude,annoying,steals my sword,and dosen't shutup about anarchy she sounds like shes krieg with that stuff

krieg:IMPOSSIBLE!

zero:oh its possible/for shes crazy/just like you

back to the other room

gaige:-HES A TOTAL DICK HE HAS NO REPECT FOR SCIENCE!AND WORST OF ALL H-

lilith:GAIGE CALM DOWN!

gaige:NO!I WILL NOT CALM DOWN I AM GOING TO BEAT THE LIVING SH*T OUT OF ZERO!*shes full on anarchy*

maya:gaige stop now!

maya phaselocks gaige and gets her anarchy to disapear

gaige:ow what happened?

lilith:anarchy happened

gaige:heh...so shall we contintue?

maya:no more anarchy

gaige:yea got it

now with the boys

fleshstick:HAHAHHA!

axton throws a rock at him

axton:SHUT UP!

zero:where did you get that rock?

axton:while you guys were talking i got hit in the head with a rock by someone outside

salvador:hey amigo theres a note on it!

axton takes the note off and reads it

axton:its says i have returned and you will suffer for you kids have ruined my life and my plan

blake:ummmm whos it from?

axton:don't know it dosen't say

the lights go out in the boys room

salvador:AHHH!*PUNCHES AXTON*

axton:WHY!?

zero:lets go outside i see someone out there

the boys go outside

jack:uuuhhh this might be a bad idea

krieg:MEATBAGS AFRAID OF THE DARKNESS THAT SWALLOWS YOUR SOUL!

salvador:...

zero:darkness is freind/not a foe/to me anyways

they heard footsteps

axton:its are enemy now*holds up his pistol*

mad maw:someone should go up ahead

everyone:FLESHSTICK!

they push fleshstick to go further into where they heard the footsteps

fleshstick:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!*a bloode pool starts flowing towards the group*

salvador:AHHHHHH!

axton:WHAT THE F*cK!?

jack:zero you go next!

jack pushes zero towards where fleshstick was last heard

zero:oh shit!

they hear gunfire and axton and salvadorand krieg run towards it

?:HAHAHAHHAHAHA!

axton:SHOOT IT!

they shoot everything in there guns until they here the sound if a mini machine gun

krieg:SPACE MAN!

the minigun shoots towards them but there were two miniguns attacking them

zero ran past the others

axton:ZERO YOUR ALIVE!

zero:GET YOUR GUNS!

zero gets his harold while axton gets his conference call(ill jut do cc for short)kreig gets his hellfire while salvador has two norfleets

axton:KILL IT!

they all shoot with everything they had and then two figures appear in hoods holding miniguns

?:any last WORDS YOU LITTLE BASTARDS!?

zero snuck up behind them in deception and used his kunais to corrode the miniguns and burn away the hoods while axton got his turret out and krieg got his buzzsaw and prepared what was ahead

goopmocker:ALL YOU BITCHES ARE GOING TO HELL MUHAHAHAHAHAHA

nigro:COME ON ASSHOLES YOUR ALL GOING TO DIE BY MY TWO BLOODY HANDS!

everyone:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

salvador:IMPOSSIBLE*RUNS BEHIND AXTONS TURRETS*

nigro:SOON YOU'LL BE DEAD AND WORLD DOMINATION IS ARES

zero:that was never explained

goopmocker:oh well you see the thing i-*they both get runned over by the bus*

zero:right on schedule xD

jack:wow there such dicks who else is gonna be like them?

everyone stares at him

jack:what!?

they all went back inside

axton:that was...terrifying

zero:...

salvador:HOW IS NEGRO EVEN ALIVE!?

blake:i don't wanna know but i recorded all this to motherf*ckers end

krieg:YAY!

mad maw:ARE U F*CKIN SERIOUS!?WE ALMOST DIED!

blake:so?

mad maw:SO...SO...ahhh whatever

they all went back to the room and now with the girls

gaige:ok maya truth or dare?

maya:dare

gaige:i dare you to go see what the boys are doing

maya:but where not aloud to go to the other room

everyone was silent then started laughing

maya:yea since when do we follow the rules?

lilith:besides its just reall quick

maya goes to sneak in the boys room

zero:what now?

krieg:BUNKERS!

axton:bunkers and badasses?

krieg:NO!BUNKERS!

everyone:...

jack:oh he means the new version of bunkers and badasses i got that yesterday

salvador:WHERE DO YOU GET ALL THIS MONEY?!

jack:my allowence is 2000$ a week

krieg:RICH GUYS FEEL PAIN!

maya is behind the dresser in the boys room listening to what there saying

zero:well just to ask do you think those two will come back?

salvador:that guy came back from the dead so probably

blake:wait then how is fleshstick alive?his head was blown off

fleshstick:I WEAR GEAAAAAR!

everyone was kinda sad because they all hated him even krieg

krieg:DIE FLESH OF ANNOYANCE!YOUR SKULL WE'LL BE MY NECKLACE AS I SLAUGHTER MY FOES!

maya went back to the girls

lilith:so what are they doing?

maya:they were talking about some people i don't know who but apparently tried to kill fleshstick,shame it would be nice to see him go

gaige:why don't we just go ask them?

lilith:we were kinda ordered to stay away from the boys room

gaige:so?

lilith:well my moms a siren too so yea i don't want to get in trouble...again besides thats a school thing

maya:well we have clues to who it might be lets see what about wanting to kill fleshsti-oh who am i kidding everyone wants to kill him

lilth:well how about we just go to sleep

gaige:fine

they fell drift to sleep and now in the morning and maya wakes up

maya:hey guys wake up!

lilith gets up but to be shown with a curly drawn mustache as do gaige

maya:pffffft what happened to you guys?*laughs*

lilith:what are yo-*looms in the mirror*YOU LITTL-

maya:hold up i didn't do this!

gaige:clearly

maya:what do you mean?

gaige:look in the mirror

maya goes to look in the mirror and has one as well and is very pissed and runs to the boys room

maya:OK WHO DID THIS!?

the boys wake up but to be shown that they all have fake mustaches on them and as for zero his emoticon was just stuck on a mustache

salvador:WHAT THE HELL YOU TALKIN ABOUT!?

zero:*looks in the mirror to see a holo mustache*why you...*notices the mustache on her face and laughs*

maya:whats so funny!?

zero:your face

maya:rrrrghhhhh

the kids went down stairs to see the parents sitting on the couch laughing which was wierd to them and then they realized they were laughing at them

krieg:whhyyyyyyyyyy!?

liliths mom:because its funny

salvador mumbles something in spanish

salvadors dad:i heard that

salvador:hmph

* * *

now with me and caleb in the hospital

captaindrake:this is why youdon't mess with someones fanfic ow

i had received several broken bones but commandercaleb legs was broken

commandercaleb:you asked for it

captaindrake:so you wanna break space and time just to mess with me?

commandercaleb:hwll y-WAIT WHAT!?

a black hole appears

captaindrake:ahhhhh!i hope you likedmy chapter and leave a review,and maybe ablack hole remote!

both:ahhhhhhhhh!

we both get sucked in


	6. not a chapter

captaindrake:ok im back from...the black hole and this is not a chapter i just wanted to say some things and have your opinion about some of my ideas.

1.i have an idea to add angel in here as well but i would have to mix some stuff up for in the game jack is her father or i could say shes from a different time and is now in the past and stuck there for now your choice if i should add her or not and how i should do it

scarlet and the sheriff*don t know what her real name is if u do though tell me or else ill make it up* because it could use more girls i think just to make it more interesting

3.i am doing may0 or mayaXzero whatever u like to call it but since zero is still an assassin im gonna make it a little bit more difficult but i might put them together in the next chapter or the next one

4. those of you roland fans i will pair him with someone just not lilith(srry if u were hopin for lilithXroland)

5. an oc to the story her name would be sylindria she would be brave but scared at times depenedable very sweat but very angry when you try to mess with her(she will kick you in the balls)and her ability could be power weild where she in that state can shoot energy from her arms and she also loves pistols and ill put my name in as her father if u like or i could just leave unamed such as the other vault hunters parents she would have black curly hair,jeans,and a pink jacket,and have sapphire eyes.

6.i could do another oc named jake sylindrias brother has the same ability but has more speed than his sister(they can run pretty fast in that state too)but has less accuracy he would be very confused in love situations dosen't usually get scared easily and likes to give people second chances(usually stab him in the back)he would have jeans,a blue, jacket,thick brown hair and,hazel eyes.

7. moxxi in it ill leave that decision to you

8. the final one should i add scoo-you know what hell yea im putting scooter in

* * *

captaindrake:ok plz leave a review i will wait a while i want your opinion thank you for your time :)

commandercaleb:no chapter!?

captaindrake:yep

commandercaleb:well since yo-

captaindrake:i am not adding you in you will ruin it i know you

commandercaleb leaves


	7. Chapter 7 valentines

captaindrake:hey everybody i have another chapter and its about valentines day so plz leave a review!

commmandercaleb:NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

captaindrake:calm down there will still be alot of humor in it!

commandercaleb:YAY!

* * *

valentines day:

now at school the class is waiting for carroll and now with the boys

krieg:WHERE IS MEAT MAN OF THE TEACHING!

zero:who knows

mad maw:...so who you guys bringing for valentines?

zero:what?

salvador:you know your valentines

zero:why wo-oh its valentines day...

blake:YOU FORGOT!?

zero:yep

axton:well i got my valentine lilith!

zero:yea i was never really in love before

axton:you sure i could probably think of someone

salvador:maybe

zero:who?

axton:maybe just maybe

zero:stop acting like im not here

mad maw:what about that blue haired siren?

axton:DAMNIT YOU RUINED IT!

salvador:wait why are you guys hanging with us wheres jack?

blake oh well you see jack broke his back so now were gonna hang with you for now

krieg:HOW DID RICH MAN BREAK HIS BACK!?

blake:well you see after he realized his girlfreind broke up with him

*flashback*

jack jumps off a cliff

*end of flashback*

axton:CALLED IT!

blake:ummm back to zero now

salvador:well do even like maya zero?

zero:well...*glances at maya and turns back*

now with the girls

maya:are you guys sure about this i mean hes not exactly love material?

gaige:maya we know you like him, besides if it fails pizza exists!

lilith:no pressure oh know how zeros like

gaige:you mean when you tryed to kiss him?

lilith:shut it

maya:oh yea you had a-

lilith:one more word out of your mouth and no docter alive will be able to fix what i do to you!

carroll comes in with candy in his hands

carroll:HEY KIDS!it's valentines day!so we don't do any work today but tommarrow we gotta do some stuff k?

gaige:OK!

carroll:ok i got candies to give to your valentines but if you don't have one you can eat yourselfs i don't judge and im going to go out while you guys do it for less pressure ok

carroll leaves and now with axton and lilith and someone else

axton:hey lilith heres your gift

lilith:awwww thx sweetie heres yours

roland:and heres mine

lilith:roland i don't like you i have a boyfreind

roland:you mean the guy who you barely know and got together with when you had a crush on zero?

axton:THATS It*PUNCHES ROLAND*

they start fighting and now with zero and salvador

zero:so wheres your valentine salvador?

salvador:oh she dosen't go to this school yet, and speaking of valentines shouldn't you be getting yours

zero:im starting to rethink this...

salvador:NONESENSE!

zero:i am an assassin and love is -

salvador:A DISTRACTION AND DISTRACTIONS GET YOU KILLED ALL BULLSH*T

zero:...

salvador:look i know you like her and all yo-where did he go?

zero comes back

salvador:WHERE DID YOU GO!?

zero:asked maya out

salvador:really!? wow i must have been a b-

zero:you were talking to my hologram the whole time i don't know what you said

salvador:...f*ck you

zero:...

salvador:so what did she say?

zero:what do you think?

salvador:no?

zero:no

salvador:yes

zero:yes

salvador:wow good for you man you two are gonna eat choclate, go on dates, kiss puppies,an-

zero:this totally sounds assinine

salvador:it totally is

BOOOOM!

salvador:AHHHHH*PUNCHES AXTON*

axton:WHY!?ZERO WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!

salvador:because its funner

axton:WHAT THE F*ck!?

salvador:sorry your just so punchable

zero:true true

the smoke clears up and reveals goopmocker and negro

goopmocker:muahahaha!you are going to pay for what you have done to us YESTERDAY!

maya:wait what did happen to you?

zero:the bus happened xD

the police then bust through the door

police officer:THE POLICE ARE HERE!

gaige:MAN F*CK THE POLICE!

zero:shut up gaige

negro:YOU WILL NEVER TAKE US ALIVE MUHAHAHA!*SHOOTS THE POLICE AND GO RUNNING IN THE SCHOOL*

krieg:CHASE DOWN MY PREY HAHAHAHA!*CHASES THEM*

axton:hey guys we should split up how about we go with are girlfreinds

everyone agreed and went out and now with zero and maya

maya:sooo were a couple now

zero:yep

maya:what do couples exactly do?

zero:i don't know...be ourselves?

gaige:umm guys how about we find goopmocker and get out of here now!?

maya:gaige! were talkin about our love life!

gaige:...

zero:correct

goopmocker appears and shoots at them

goopmocker:HAH YOU GUYS ARE TOGETHER!? CALLED IT! MUAHAHAHAHHA

zero:maya look out!*pushes maya out of the way and takes a hit*ow

maya:are you ok?!

zero:of all the insensitive, assinine,bullsh*t, this is a true phsycotic bastard in my life

zero gets his kunais and is in rage (remember zeros kunais and stuff accept for his hologram is certain powers) and throw them at goopmocker and it corrodes through and burns her almost to death

goopmocker:AHHHHHH!IM ON FIRE!

maya phaselocks her and ties her up in a chair and puts her in a cleaner car(one of those things around school were they drive it to clean AND STUFF)and now with axton and the others

police:ok caught negro

axton:actually thats a dummy we have the reall negro

police guard:*slaps himself* really tommy really!?

tommy:sorry i wanted a raise

then maya and zero show up on the cleaner with goopmocker while maya is wearing sunglasses while zero holds his sword up in victory

gaige:can i do something now?

maya:its more of a couples thing *smiles*

gaige jumps off

axton:talking about goin in style

zero:xD

* * *

captaindrake:yea so...that happened xD plz leave a review and i like what i have done. caleb?

commandercaleb:well i guess it was...oh who am i kidding THAT WAS AWESOME!

captaindrake:hell yea it is!


	8. Chapter 8 happy birthday

captaindrake123:ok hey everybody i am back and i want to thank you for the over 300 views and i am going to put some of the characters in but not all of them still thinking about it,and plz leave a review i don't have too many of them plz write some i would really appreciate it if you tell me some of your opinions thank you.

commandercaleb:well heres my opinion you suck

captaindrake:thats it your sooo dead

i beat the living shit out of him while he trys to get away

captaindrake:anything else?

commandercaleb:no im good...

zero:well that was brutal

captaindrake:shouldn't you get to your part?

zero:...

* * *

fears:

its been a week since the incident with goopmocker and are now in there class waiting for there teacher but they will have a suprise

salvador:where is he!?

axton:i don't know

lilith:well atleast this gives me alone time with you *smiles and kisses him on the cheek*

axton:well im happy

the princible comes in

princible:hello students i am mr. hammerlock and i am your princible

salvador:hello!

hammerlock:why hello so anyways has been in a horrible accident and now has both legs and an arm broken

maya:thats horrible

hammerlock:indeed but he will be ok as for now your substitute teacher will be helping you understand

gaige:yes sir!

hammerlock:wonderful!here she is now

moxxi:hey there kids!here i am

hammerlock leaves the kids with moxxi and now up for a lesson

moxxi:ok kids my name is moxxi and the first thing i want you to do is tell me your worst fears you know get it all out ok lets get started i want you guys to write me pictures of what ur fear is

5 minutes later all the kids are done and flynt is up first

moxxi:ok flynt show us what your afraid of

flynt shows everyone a picture of zero stabbing him

axton:CALLED IT!

zero:xD

flynt:shut up!

moxxi well thats interesting next up maya

maya shows everyone a picture of elmo

maya:hes so f*cking creepy

moxxi:...ok next up zero

zero gets up and shows everyone a disturbing picture

everyone:AHHHHHHHHHHH!

salvador faints and axton hides behind lilith

zero:...

moxxi:well sugar you can now go back to your seat

zero goes back down but not before he tells everbody something

zero:oh i almost forgot to mention its my birhday today i am now 6

everyone claps but are still scarred from the picture as he sits back down

jack gets up and shows a picture of maya and lilith with needles in them

maya:oh hes so going to be scared

jack:...

jack sits back down and then axton gets up

axton:i am not afraid of anything like i can be scared

zero throws ladybug at him

axton:OH GOD WHY GET IT OFF!

axton goes to sit back down and everyone else shows there fears

moxxi:and now krieg

krieg comes up and shows everyone his picture

gaige:ITS SOOOOO CUTE!

its a bunny

krieg:ITS THE CUDDLING MONSTER OF DEATH!

zero:you know we have a class bunny right?

krieg slowly turns his head around to see a bunny

krieg:...AHHHHHHHHHHHH BLOODY DEATH OF CUDDLING!*RUNS TO SEAT*

zero finds a card that said come by me soon sweatie and are time having sex will be one to remember(the card was for moxxi)

moxxi:hey zero what do you have there?

zero:whats sex?

moxxi:...ummmm your too young for that*takes the card* maybe when your older

zero:?

axton:we say swear words and hold guns i think we should have the right to know

moxxi:believe me you don't want to know

the bell rings for lunch and everyone goes

maya:so zero i got you a present

zero:really?

maya:well its for your party but this will do for now*kisses his visor*

zero:3

krieg:MEAT!

krieg passes everyone hamburgers which he took and a first grader comes over

kid:hey look its the little babies and let me guess its your birthday

zero:hmph

kid:let me guess ur sooo special like right you guys are just a bunch o-

zero punches the kid and knocks him out and the first graders go charging at them

axton:get them!

and after that the first graders had all broken bones and went to the hospital and now at recess

jack:well that didn't last long

maya:ofcourse it didn't

krieg:hahaha!bloode on my MEATBYCYCLE!

salvador:hey guys tommarrow were getting new students did you know?

zero:really?

axton:yea i heard but most of them are girls

gaige:is that a problem?

axton:no!im just saying girls are weak

and after that gaige punches him with her robot arm

gaige:you were saying?

axton:nothing...*coughs out bloode*

gaige:thats what i thought

salvador:well one of them is my girlfreind!

krieg:HURT THE ONE YOU LOVE DO IT!

brick:can't wait to meet her

mordecei:she must be aloooot like you

salvador:WHO ARE YOU GUYS!?

lilith:oh i forgot this is brick and mordecei

mordecei:sup

brick:hey wanna go break stuff!?

salvador:HELL YEA!

and that day they became best freinds and now back in class

moxxi:ok kids i want you to tell me who are the most annoying people in this class

everyone:FLESHSTICK!

fleshstick:ME!? I LOVE CHICKS!

moxxi:fleshstick go to the princible office!*throws a book at him and it was really heavy*

fleshstick:WH-AHHHHHH*RUNS TO PRINCIBLE OFFICE*

everyone:HAHAHA!

the bell rings

moxxi:ok schools out kids

and now at the park where zeros party is

everyone:HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

zero::)

zeros mother:we all baked a big cake for you zero,and a big muffin for salvador

salvador sees a muffin the same size as him

salvador:YESSSSSSSSSSS!*JUMPS IN THE MUFFIN*

maya:hey zero heres your present

zero opens it to find a neclace with a locket of a picture of him and maya

zero:')

gaige:my turn!heres you present zero

zero opens it to find a new set of digistruct technolog that he can use to take his stuff off and on instantly and hack into things

zero::D

salvador:mmmmmmmm

axton stares at him

salvador:what!?...oh right here zero!

zero opens it and finds a hawk eye the one hes been wanting for weeks and has been saving for it

zero::o...its beautifal

axton:i think you will like my gift even more

axton hands him his gift

zero:...

zero finds it to be a sham with a 94% percent chance to absorb a bullet

axton:i knew you have been wanting this for a while zero and so i got it for you

zero:umm actually...

axton:yea i know its aweseome

zero:i wanted an electric proof bee but thx anyways

axton:...DAMNIT!

krieg:TAKE MY PRESENT OF FIRE!

zero oipens it to find a norfleet an explosive one

zero:thx krieg how thoughful*shoots it at a tree and it blows up*

krieg:MY PLEASURE FOR I AM YOUR BEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSST FREIND!

axton:no im his best freind!

salvador:guys we all know he and me are tight

kreig:WANNA PROVE IT!?

blake:why were we even invited!?

zero:i thought we were freinds

jack:SINCE WHEN!?

blake:well actually i t-

jack:NEVER!

mad maw:bu-

jack:never!

then all of a sudden people hear something in the bushes and two people jump out

elmo and cookie monster:HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAHAHAHA!

everyone:...AHHHHHH!*CLIMBS UP THE SLIDE*

zero:NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

cookie monster:come on birthday kid!

zero stares into his cold dark eyes of death and despair and runs

zero:OH GOD WHYYYYY!?

now with everyone in the playground igloo

axton:its are worst fears made!

maya:*shivers*hes here oh my god

zero puts his arm around her to comfort her

zero:we need to stop them!

salvador:they took my muffin!

krieg:I...FEEL...FEAR!

gaige:we have to kill them now!

axton:lets go!

they go out and find a robot band(but they don't know that)which creeped them out even more

zero:GET THEm!

everyone shoots the robots but they just bounce off

axton:WHAT IS IT MADE OUT OF!?

salvador gunzerks

salvador:DIE!

salvador shoots them with two cc's it leaves dents and goes to the ground but is still working

gaige:HOW!?

zero throws his corrosive kunais at it and maya phaselocks it

axton:are they gone?

elmo:HEYO!

maya faints

cookie monster:come on birthday boy!

axton throws out his turrets and the cookie monster goes flying

cookie monster:WHYYYYY!?

axton:TAKE THAT!

cookie monser:you little...

axton:HOW ARE YOU!?zero help me!

zero isn't there

axton:oh shit

axton is all of a sudden hit with a ball of energy and goes flying

axton:WHYYYYYYYY!?

gaige:GET HIM DEATHTRAP!

deathtrap goes after him but instantly explodes

gaige:NOOOOO!

zero:get him!

everyone charges him

cookie monster:MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!

elmo:BRING IT ON!

zero slices elmo in half with his sword but the cookie monster is still up and maya is phaselocking him but failing

maya:HOW IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE!?

cookie monster:IT ISN'T!HAHAHA!

krieg:KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT!

zero uses execute on him but hes still alive and shoots him but the bullets just deflect and go towards axton

axton:AHHHHH! OH COME ON!

cookie monster:NOTHING CAN STOP M-AHH!

salvador shot him in the balls and he powers down

zero:get him!

they all shoot him with everything they have

cookie monster:NOOO I WILL NOT DIE!

axton:i guess its time we show him what we can really do

they all use there special abilities and really start trying using everything they have zero throwing kunais maya slag orbs axton missles krieg axes salvador his guns and everyone else

cookie monster:NOOOOOOOOO!

he explodes and leaves a huge crater

zeros father:WHAT THE F*CK ARE YOU DOING!?

zeros mother:HONEY!

zeros father:sorry,WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU KIDS DOING!?

gaige:WE BEAT THE ULTIMATE EVIL OF THE UNIVERSE!

park manager:HEY!

parents:RUN!

the shoot at the manager and ran

* * *

captaindrake:oh yea this is great plz leave a review i am kinda happy today

commandercaleb:WOOOOOOOOO!

captaindrake:and now im not*gets hit by water balloon*


	9. Chapter 9 what a day

captaindrake:ok i am back and caleb will not be here today because he has a date with the hospital

commandercaleb is carried away to the hospital

commandercaleb:i...will...RETURN!*passes out*

captaindrake:huh i wonder what we were fighting about...huh oh well plz leave a review seriously i don't have too many xD

* * *

what a day:

the day after zeros birthday everyone is outside of school

axton:uhhhhh i f*cking hate school

gaige:tell me about it why do we have to go again my IQ points are in there 2000's

maya:the government makes us

zero:i hate the government

they all go inside the school and for class

moxxi:ok kids today we have new students,come on in

the new students come in

scarlet:hello everybody im scarlet

salvador:hey!

scarlet:and im most glad to see you

axton:what?

moxxi:ok thats enough everbody else introduce yourselfs

syllindria:hello!im syllindria

jake:im jake

scooter:WHATS UP MY MOTHERF*CKERS!?IM SCOOTER!

krieg:I LIKE THIS GUY!

zero:...

sheriff:just call me the sheriff

jack stares at the most beautufal women at he has ever seen and is now actually glad he broke up with his GF

moxxi:ok pick your seats

maya:syllindria sit over here!

syllindria:thanks!

she sits

jake:hmmm where to sit?

axton:hey over here

jake:thanks

sits

(scarlet sits next to salvador scooter sits next to tina and so on just not to drag it on anymore)

moxxi:oh wait!angel its your turn to introduce yourself

angel:...hello

jack:WHAT!?OH MY F*CKING GOD SHES HERE!

axton:i think she'll fit in just nicely

zero:xD

angel:...

jack:why is my sister here!?

everyone:SISTER!?

maya:OK NOW THIS IS BULLSH*T!

axton:WHAT SHE SAID!

justin biever comes in

gaige:oh no not you!

justin biever:what i can't come to see my sweet love?

gaige:GET THE F*cK AWAY FROM ME STOP HITTING ON ME YOU F*cKING PERVERT!

justin biever:oh come on ill sing for you,oh baby baby o-

zero:NO!I WILL NOT LISTEN TO YOUR STUPID SONGS!...AGAIN!

axton:...what?

tina:what!? girl he cool

zero:F*CK NO!

justin biever:are u jealous?

zero:what!? F*CK NO!gaige is so annoying and steals my stuff

gaige:HEY!I WISH YOU WOULD JUST F*cK OFF!

zero:i wish you would stop talking but thats not gonna happen

gaige:*growls*

moxxi:...

the police bust in

police guard:THIS IS THE POLICE!

gaige:MAN F*CK THE POLICE!

police guard:WE ARE HERE TO TAKE JUSTIN BIEVER TO JAIL!

gaige:POLICE I LOVE YOU!

axton:well since gaige isn't doing it anymore, F*cK THE POLICE!

lilith:shut up axton

tina:AWKWARD!

justin biever:I WILL RETURN FOR YOU GAIGE FOR I LOVE YOU!

gaige:SHUT THE F*CK UP AND GO TO JAIL!

angel:i...

maya:oh yea forgot what we were doing before all...this happened

moxxi:i was just introducing angel

angel:yeaaaaaaa im just gonna go into my seat before anything else happens...

lilith:you can sit next to me it's far way from jack

angel immedietly takes the seat

syllindria:...does this usually happen?

maya:more than you think

now over where jake is sitting

jake:wow do you do this everyday?

axton:yep

zero:pretty much xD

jake:whoa thats cool

zero:thanks

jake:what your name?

zero: zero *displays a zero*

axton:hey im axton

jake:cool

now with the girls

maya:well this is literally the craziest day in my life and i expect to say the same thing tommarrow

syllindria:wow this school is pretty cool

angel:more like wierd...

lilith:wait a minute are you a siren angel!?

angel:wow how did you guess was it the tattoos or the collar on me?

lilith:why is there a collar on you?

angel:the government gave me it to keep me under control even though its perfectly ok

zero comes over

zero:F*CK THE GOVERNMENT*slices collar off*

zero goes back

syllindria:...well wasn't that nice of him?

maya:THANKS ZERO!

lilith:oh hey maya just to ask have you kissed zero yet?

maya:i kissed him yea

lilith:on the lips?

maya:...no

lilith:ofcourse you didn't

maya:WHAT!?so what i kiss his visor i respect him just as he does me

syllindria:is he your boyfreind?

maya:yes

angel:this looks awkward so im just gonna not get into it

lilith:good because i won't get into it either

(maya and syllindria talk while angel and lilith avoid getting in the conversation)and now with the boys

salvador grabs his backpack and gets a can out

salvador:ahhhh muffin a can

zero:?

axton:what?

salvador:*trys to open*DAMNIT I CAN'T OPEN IT!*DROPS TO NEES*NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

jake:oh i'll get it*blasts it open*

zero:!

axton:WHAT THE HELL!?

salvador:THANKS MAN!*EATS*

jake:oh yea i forgot to mention i can blast things

krieg:BLAST BLAST BLAST HELL OF THE BLAST!

jake:oh hi there whats your name?

krieg:KRIIIIIEG!...STARING CONTEST!

they both stare

krieg:*blinks*NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

jake:wow that was fun

krieg:FUN FUN FUN!

jake:ok...

zero:well thats very interesting

jake:so what can you guys do?

zero:he just throws out two turrets and i turn invisible and throw elemental kunais and have a digistruct blade

axton:hey are you saying only my turrets are useful!?

zero:yes

axton:why you oh godamnit i walked into that one

salvador:yes yes you did

axton:well i got other things that are useful you know

zero:like what?

axton:i uh...well theres...what about...oh godamnit i have nothing,wait what about my military training?

zero:wow axton actually named one

jake:you guys are funny

bell rings for lunch and now at lunchtime

lilith:so salvador is this your girlfreind you were talking about?

scarlett:yes yes i am

salvador:SHES THE BEST!*kisses her*

tina:GET A ROOM!

government people come through the door

agent:the government is here stay in school kids, and where is angel?

zero:F*CK THE GOVERNMENT!

zero pushes angel under a table and jumps out a window

agent:agents go get him he may know something!

all of his agents go after him

lilith:well that was...random

krieg:blooooode*stares at agent*

maya:krieg...

syllindria:what is he doing?

jake:krieg?

axton:just stay out of his way

syllindria:what do yo-

krieg goes charging

krieg:YOUR HEAD IS FOR MY MOOSES WALL!

he attacks him and the other agents return with zero in a high tech security cage

zero:you gotta be f*cking kidding me right now

agent:SHUT UP!*SHOCKS ZERO*

maya:hey!you mess with my boyfreind you mess with me!

agent:aren't you a little young?

lilith:and maya he won't even lift up his helmet for you to k-

maya:OH MY GOD!ARE WE REALLY STILL DOING THIS!?

maya phaselocks the agents and frees zero and the agents are knocked out

zero:thanks sweetie :)

maya kisses him on the visor

maya:anytime

krieg:HELP!

krieg is thrown out the window

krieg:ow

maya:ok why can't i phaselock him?!

zero:...

agent:HAHAH-*hit with a blast*

syllindria:ok can we eat now?

jake:nice work sis

now at recess

salvador:oh you think you can beat me!?

jake:why not?

salvador:IM GOING TO WIN!

jake:i'll do my best

salvador:LETS GO!

salvador shoots a random person when he was suppose to hit a target which jake hit

person:OH GOD WHY!?

salvador:whoops...

jake:i win!

now over by syllindria

fleshstick:HEY GIRL!LETS HAVE SOME FUN!

syllindria:...

fleshstick:YOU ARE WIEEEERD WANNA FALL OFF A CLIFF!?or SHARE A-*KICKED IN THE BALLS*

syllindria:get away from me you dumbass!

fleshstick:WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?

now back in class

moxxi okay kids it's time to-*phone rings*oh damnit sorry kids o gotta take this ill be outside you guys have fun

moxxi goes out and now with jack

jack:hey girl

sheriff:hey cutie

jack:wanna go out!?

sheriff:no

axton:FAIL!

jack:please?

sheriff:well since you asked nicely sure

axton:WHAT!?

jack:YES!

blake:...this won't last long will it?

mad maw:i give it a few days

now with scooter

scooter:hey girl i have an idea of making cars EVERYWHERE!

gaie:yea thats sooooo gonna happen...

scooter:I KNOW RIGHT!?(oh the irony)

zero:so how is this gonna work?

scooter:here i'll show you!*digistructs a car right on top of him*

zero:AHHHH!

gaige:WHAT THE HELL MAN?!

flynt:HAHA!

salvador:shut up flynt!

jake:well thats pretty cool,hey you need help?

zero:sure why not?

jake blasts the car and blows it up so zero can get up

scooter:HEY YOU BLEW IT UP!

scooter punches him multiple times but jake dosen't feelt it

jake:is that suppose to hurt?

axton:hah!he punches like a g-

all the girls stare at him with fury in there eyes and fists up

axton:what i ment to say is!HE PUNCHES LIKE SH*T

girls:thats what we thought

blake:hah!

zero:xD

maya:you better watch yourself axton

axton:yea i know

* * *

captaindrake:thanks everybody for reading this chapter hope you like plz leave a-

jake:OH!can i do it!?

captaindrake:oh sure why not

jake:YES!we hope you leave a review everybody!

syllindria:thank you for your time!


	10. Chapter 10 different way

captaindrake:How did you heal so fast!?

Commandercaleb shrugs.

captaindrake:...plz leave a review...

different way:

now after school

axton:Something dosen't seem right.

zero:?

salvador:Yea it was different today

gaige:EVERYTHING WASN'T RANDOM!

lilith:Yea i know its actually kinda nice

gaige:Ok just justin where are you!?

maya:Ummmm gaige...

gaige:WHERE!?

lilith:GAIGE!

gaige:WHAT!?

lilith:Calm down!

gaige:But if i do something always happens.

zero:Well gaige it seems that it's...easier to live with today.

salvador:Well i like it.

maya:Well since today is a nice day i thought we could throw a party

Everyone stares at her.

maya:WHAT!?

gaige:Wow thats cool

axton:Sure why not

lilith:Yea but where are we going to do it?

jake:OH!What about my house?

syllindria:*coves his mouth*Don't be crazy jake!

axton:I like the idea!

syllindria:What so you can crash our house?

axton:Maybe...

jack:WERE YOU GUYS IGNORING US THW WHOLE TIME!?

zero:Yes.

blake:We were thinking that since it's almost holloween we should get are costumes too

lilith:Thats a great idea maybe-

boys:No...

maya:We could do a-

boys:NO!

gaige:A PRINCESS PLAY!

boys:NOOOOOOOOOO!

scarlet:oh come on s-

salvador:F*CK NO!

maya:Zero your go-

zero:Oh hell no.

Zero runs and jumps into the bushes

lilith:Axton y-

Oh axton was gone before this even started.

angel:FINE THERES NO PRINCESS PLAY!

Axton comes out of his hiding spot in a big mud zero comes out of his hiding place as well.

syllindria:Well are you sure you wanna do this at are house are parents are sorta...

jake:Don't worry are parents are cool!

syllindria:Im going to regret this but ok...

axton:WOOOO!

krieg:I WILL BRING THE MEAT FOR THE PART!

zero:Yes we should all bring stuff for the party smart thinking krieg.

axton:WAIT WHAT!?

krieg:MY IDEA!

axton:...Ill bring the cake!

zero:i'll get the chips and dip.

maya:Soda for me.

salvador:I'll get the muffins!

everyone:...

The all got there list of things to get and started sending out now at zeros house.

zero:Hmmmmm alien...robo cop...or batman?Hmmmmmmmm...(he is picking a suit but it will be for a different reason :)

Puts on alien suit.

zero:Hmmmm...

Zeros mother comes in.

zeros mom:OH HOW ADORABLE!

zero:GET THE F*cK OUT!

zeros mom:LANGUAGE!

zero:sorry..GET THE HECK OUT!

Zero shoves her out and grabs the batman costume and puts it on.(he also puts the robocop in his echo just for incase)And now with everyone already at the party.

maya:Hey guys...what are you suppose to be?

salvador:A MUFFIN!

angel:...Im a power ranger

krieg:GALICK GUN!

Krieg has his hair sticked up and turned blonde and has a blue shirt with white gloves and boots.(you guessed it but he still has a mask)

gaige:Your vegeta!

krieg:YEP YEP YEP!...GALICK GUN!

axton:Im a alien!

maya:Im an angel.

angel:how original.*giggles*Im a devil this year im always so nice but today im gonna cuss no matter who tells me not too!

axton:Yea your wierd plus why would y-

angel:Shut up ass face.

axton:I...oh damnit i walked into that.

gaige:IM...WAIT FOR IT...DEATHTRAP!

Gaige is wearing deathtrap.(pretty cool right?)

lilith:HOW!?

gaige:Nevermind that wheres zero?

Zero is on the roof waiting for someone

zero:I...am...batman!

All the members of the party gather around to see whats going that jack appears in his bane costume.

jack:IM HERE!

zero:We meet again...bane.

jack presses a button and activates his metal arms to get bigger his metal arms grow such as the real bane would.

jack:This won't take long

And then the battle begun zero dodged left and right from jacks lasers that he had in those metal thought quickly and threw one of his corrosive kunais to stop the lasers but jack came down and caught him in a full didn't give up though he quickly kicked him in the stomach and jumped to kick him in the used his metal arms to smash the ground they landed on and send zero flying but zero was smarter then that so he ran and jumped onto jacks suit before the quake could hit him and stabbed his arms with his that jack used the remaining arm he had to climb onto the house and so zero followed,he brought his blade up and sprinted towards jack slicing his robotic legs from his suit but jack hit zero with a devestating was on the ground trying to get up,that punch made zero dizzy and while that happened jack was ready to escape but zero ran towards him not caring he just had to do it and so he punched him and he fell of the roof.

zero:I win...

Jack was gone but zero knew he was going to be back

zero:You will never win for this town will always have a...batman!

Now five minutes later inside the house.

maya:Hey zero where have you been?

zero:Places.

axton:Awwww man i thought we were gonna be aliens man?

zero:sorry man.

axton:ok.

lilith:Well this party is great why were you so afraid of your parents?

syllindria:you will see

Jack and syllindrias parents come home and go to the childeren

jacks dad:OH HEY!

jacks mother:Oh you guys look so cute!*takes a picture*

zero:Hey!NO ONE TAKES A PICTURE OF BATMAN!

jacks mother:how adorable.

maya:...

jacks dad:i'll go print these out right now!

axton:WHAT!?

The parents leave to print them out.

gaige:Ok i see what you mean about them.

syllindria:...

tina:AWKWARD!

gaige:Shut up tina.

tina:fine...HE YOU WANNA BLOW SOMETHING UP!?

gaige:HELL YEAH I DO!

**captaindrake:hey guys sorry it's shorter then usual Im a bit busy lately fixing stuff on some chapters xD**

**zero:I hope you get the time to do it.**

**Lilith:Yea we don't want it to look shitty.**

**captaindrake: Yeaaaaa so anyways I am now making it work a little differently but still just as funny and fun plz stay tuned**

**for part 2 weirder.**

**axton:WE HOPE YOU LEAVE A REVIEW!**

**maya:I WANTED TO DO THAT!**

**axton:whoops.**

**captaindrake: Im just gonna stay out of this.**


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